BIDET COMPANY WE’LL PAY YOU $10K JUST TO POOP!!!

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This summer job is the s**t … a bidet company is offering $10,000 for one lucky person to spend their summer testing a toilet paper alternative, and sharing the journey with all.

Here’s the dookie deal … all ya gotta do to get the dough is be able to poo, analyze and document your daily bowel movements, and share your fecal findings on social media.

The $10,000 gig comes with an exec title — Vice President of Fecal Matter — that’ll definitely stand out on your resume. Now, it’s not for everybody … ya gotta have at least 21 years on-the-job John experience, and a very open-bathroom-door policy.

The 3-month consulting position is with TUSHY, which fashions itself as a modern bathroom brand revolutionizing the way people poop with different kinds of bidets.

All applicants must submit a video and, we gotta say … good luck matching Ashley K.’s skills. Still, we’re told applications are already pouring in ahead of the company’s July 10 deadline. Makes sense … much like opinions, everyone’s got one.

It ain’t just straight poop, though … the VP will also be tasked with interviewing others about their toilet habits, testing TUSHY products against the competition, and prodeuce-ing video content for social media.

Good luck and remember, ya gotta be #1 to talk ✌?!!!

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